Last night Dave and I went to an 80s party.  We played Jeopardy and won, no thanks to me.  Dave was in his element as was my friend and her husband who has seen about every 80s movie out there.  I think I may have been the youngest one there, but it was still fun.  We got some 80s shirts for our prizes.  I am starting(meaning today was my first day) to go to the temple every Saturday morning and today I went to the 7AM session.  I was so tired last night, but felt like I needed to go this morning, so I prayed that if it was important I go first thing, that I would wake up before my alarm so I wouldn't be tired.  Well, I woke up a minute before my alarm at 6:04, so I was able to get out and make the session.  It was good to go.  By the time I got to the Celestial room, the morning light was very bright and it was breathtaking.  Later I watched a girl come out and she said a loud, "Oh my gosh," and acted like she was blinded. lol  Well, I thought it was beautiful anyway.  I got home a little after 9:30 and changed and went to the church for Super Saturday.  I made these holiday block decorations; one side is Christmas and the other is for Thanksgiving.  I also made an origami ornament.  I think they turned out well.  Dave is out sighting his rifle so he can hunt some elk next month.  This will be his first hunting experience and he is pretty excited.  Things are going well.  I am excited to decorate for Halloween with all of the stuff I bought last year after Halloween.  I also got some stuff from the dollar store.  I didn't think I got that much stuff, but Dave came upstairs and said, "I see Halloween has exploded all over the counter." haha  What can I say, it's fun to be excited about stuff.  It is getting cooler and I love this time of year! Pictures:1)Will and Maddy were buckling up and Joshua just climbed back there and sat down like he was all ready to go.  It was cute.  2)Will in his new glasses 3,4)My craft today

I had the playdoh factory toy out and hadn't put it away yet from the other kids playing with it.  So, Joshua climbs up on a chair and starts playing with it.  I immediately go into save-the-toy mode and reach for it as I say "no." Well, this kid who doesn't talk a lot, clutches the toy and says, "Mine! My durn!". I couldn't really find it in myself to take it away at that point.  After all, he had waited so long to finally have his durn :D

Well, I thought I'd finally sit down and write something thoughtful.  As I've sat here writing and deleting, I have been angry and cried.  Life is hard.  Marriage is hard.  There's a song I have been listening to about what love feels like.  It talks about how real love is hard, you feel used up and stretched out to your limits, but you're still giving and willing to fight for it.  I feel like that is so true.  At the end of the day I am so tired.  Joshua is always into something, climbing and escaping, and needy for my attention.  I can't multitask with him.  If I'm not watching him, he'll get a marker or crayon out of thin air, or the front door chain will magically be undone for him to run outside.  I literally have to put everything on hold until he sleeps or bad stuff happens.  I get nothing done until night when I'm exhausted and the other kids need my attention.  I suddenly had the bright idea to go to the gym and walk on the treadmill with Maddy and Joshua in the mornings. lol  Yes, half day kindergarten is not long enough.  Ok, I am hopeful for tomorrow now.  I have noticed more sweet moments with Will lately, it's nice.  He helps out a lot and is becoming more empathetic.  I'm going much slower on home projects since I am working out for 1.5 hours 3x and week and that's Joshua's nap right there, so not much time to do stuff the other days.  I need a vacation by myself on a high mountain where no one else is. Sigh...

I just have to vent a little bit.  Dave doing scouts is, frankly, making me angry.  They literally just had a campout the weekend before last and now they have another one tomorrow.  Then I'm told at a church meeting summers are full of campouts.  What the heck… I thought family was supposed to be top priority here and I can only think of my sleepless nights with all the kids and getting more miserable.  If he was getting paid I can see how they could ask that of leaders, but he's not.  And my cousin is in town and I haven't seen Grandma in a few weeks, so I was planning on going over there, but I don't know how I'm going to get over there because Dave has to take the van to the campout.  And even though there's a campout, they are still doing their regular weekly scout meeting tonight!!!  Filled with frustration!!!  Why don't they call older men with older kids to this calling?  The other leader has like 6 kids and just had a baby.  I can only assume she is equally frustrated. :(

So, we are hosting a friend-in-town party for my sister in law on Friday.  She said we should grill for dinner, so we then had to rush out and buy a new grill since our last one got blown to its death in a wind storm.  We needed a new one anyway, but now had the motivation to do it.  Then I decided it would be cool if we could extend our patio, so I got a quote and the guy was available to start right away.  I thought we could have this done by Friday's party, so the guy started yesterday and says he's going to be done by Thursday, which is awesome.  So now I've been envisioning a backyard oasis and got a covered bench swing, looking for a deal on patio table sets, and gonna build a fire pit, all before this party. lol  I wanted to have a brick enclosure for the grill too, but I need to be realistic here and hold off on that part.  The kids have been enjoying playing "mine craft" in the backyard with the dug up sod chunks.

It seems like a lot of people are getting divorced that I know, oh wait, they are… :( Anyway, I have had some major ups and downs in the last few years in my own marriage and I have recently been inspired by this thought: If someone told you right when you got married that you would be divorced in however many years with however many children, would you do anything different to try to prevent it?  I have been thinking about this a lot and my answer is yes.  I would work harder at communicating my feelings, I would compromise more, I would serve my spouse more, I would show affection more, I would be less critical, etc…  This list could go on forever.  The point is, if you are lazy with your marriage, you may as well expect it to end at some point and it shouldn't be a big surprise; and for those who are still in a marriage, you can start today to try to make your marriage stronger by already doing those things.  You get what you give in most marriages and it has really been an eye opener for me that my husband isn't the only one who needs to work on things - I do just as much.  I know some things happen that are out of our control and everyone's circumstances are different, but the majority of failed marriages occur because one or both partners didn't give enough.  It's like that things I see on Facebook, marriage isn't 50-50, it has to be 100-100, both have to give their all to make it work.  I didn't want to put this on fb because I don't know if anyone would find it offensive, but for my own marriage, this has been in some cases what has kept me from giving up.